Welcome back…..to me!

                                            I’M BACK…!!!   Hello out there!!   I have been gone for a bit of time and hope you have enjoyed the postings that occured in my personal abscence.  I have been on a sabbatical of sorts.  I was/am designing my own JoyVenture for the new year.  I chose to take time and dive deep into what lights me up, what I am really good at, what makes me feel….great, the best, happy, fulfilled. For those of you that don’t know, I put on my travel writers hat and published three times at www.pinkpangea.com/rala.  This was a labor of love for me, something I have wondered about for some time and I am sure I will be posting about it. Now on to what’s coming up here at www.ralajoy.com.  The offerings page will be updated in the next few weeks to reveal a new way of co-creating your life by design.  I am totally looking for my peeps that desire the chance to embrace their inner rebel (lets face it if you like me you gotta be just a wee bit rebellious yourself, or ready to fly as a newborn rebel), work together to create an amazing community of like minded, super sensitive, rebels that choose to speak their truth through love and understanding. I am looking for all of you that want to Live & Let Live so to speak.  I truly believe it is not only our divine right but also our divine obligation to be true to ourselves first and foremost.  Before anyone starts in with the “yeah but’s” I am not saying that your...

Joy in forgiveness, a follow up!

                                                joy is Yours for the taking!   Joy in forgiveness…I recently posted on this but wanted to follow up! The joy is for you, the forgiveness is for you.  That’s it, it is ALL for you. Of course the person receiving forgiveness benefits but the doing of the forgiving is all for you, yourself, and you!!!   When we hang onto our anger, hurt, resentment, et al. we are creating a negatively charged set of feelings that are now a choice. If we feel it, and feel it AND feel it some more we are choosing our own misery.  I was watching a video Brene Brown did (on Facebook no less) and she was speaking about boundaries.  She went on to say that when we don’t set and hold good boundaries we end up resentful.   We began to believe that other people are sucking on purpose (or hurting us, or angering us) just because they can.  When we don’t choose to hold our own boundaries with others, we get hurt BUT (and its a biggie) we are responsible for the discomfort we feel. This relates to forgiveness because it is also a choice.  Also, when we have good boundaries we are clear and we communicate more clearly with others and they know we mean what we say and then they don’t accidentally cross your boundaries as often.  AND when they do cross them you are in charge of your response….you choose how it impacts you.  You hold the boundary with love and kindness instead of getting so pissed “They did That to You”.   So, you...

Labor: Why do we celebrate it?

Happy Labor Day!! I know we used to need a day to recognize the workers but do we still need this?  I know that we all “labor” whether we do it at a JOB or for ourselves or at school.  But why do we need to celebrate working? I for one believe that it is because sooo many of us are LABORING and toiling away so someone else ( the one who took all the risk) can earn much higher financial rewards than we do.  In my mind, that is a fair trade if you are the type who wants to be SAFE. Being SAFE is misleading though.  We are told, “Get a real job, work the hours, work hard, do the 9 to 5,  you will get a steady paycheck AND you will be SAFE.”  But it isn’t real.  No one is SAFE from life.  From the ups and downs, from the great days and the shit days…no one escapes disappointment. The TRUTH is it’s all in our heads anyway.  An employee is no safer than an entrepenuer.   A wife/husband is no safer than a single person.  An employee is no safer a debt holder than a self employed person.  We can all lose everything in a single solitary second…and due to no fault of our own. So where did this idea of safe come from?  Who decided a married, employed person was a better bet than a single, self employed person?  A boss can fire you as quick as you can run a business into the ground.  This is not safe, this is blind.  Isn’t it interesting...

What are you Tolerating?

Hello all,   I am just back from an amazing training with Suzanne Evans in Sunny Isles Florida.  One thing that I learned that has completely impacted me is this:  What am I tolerating? As it turns out, I have a very long toleration list.  Which of course spurred me on to ask, Why am I tolerating so much and How do I stop doing it?  It is actually really easy AND super hard to stop! We are so accustomed to doing what we should, saying the “nice” thing, being pleasant always and even at our own cost….well, I am not playing like that anymore! I am not saying go out in the world, be an asshole and get what you want at someone else’s expense either, let’s just cover that before someone starts a cryin! I AM saying, take as good a care of you as you would anyone else. I AM saying, be honest even if the person may react poorly to it (they don’t want to realize that eventually the truth comes out and the longer it waits the worse it is). I am tolerating a seemingly difficult relationship with my ex.  Why am I tolerating this?  One, I have to, we have kids together and two, I didn’t realize how much I was putting up with.  I just figured this was how it went.  But it isn’t JUST how it goes, it is how I was allowing it to go. I am no longer available for the relationship as it stands but, that means I have to change it and THAT is a tough process. ...

Just Choose!!! You got this!

Hello my darlings, I have been on a wild ride!!! First, I FINALLY went to Suzanne Evans Be The Change Event for 4 days of nonstop (and I thought I was the energizer bunny!) coaching, ideas and offers. I only learned one thing I didn’t already know but I suspected, Don’t skip steps. I went through other programs and guess what, either I skipped or the program did. AHA moment….just sayin’ How many times have I desired growth, loved the idea but NEVER did the exercises or the work?? A LOT and often, in fact I can’t remember a time when I’ve ever finished a whole book exercises and all!!! I am now able to be consciously intentional, which means I am choosing that JoyVenture (or joyful Adventure for those new here), about doing the work. What fun I am having intentionally finishing the work. You can take ANYTHING and DECIDE to have fun with it ( of course I’m not talking about the bad things that happen to us all). We all have a perspective unique to us. Use yours to choose the way you see any situation. Choose consciously AND intentionally to take that boring task and find the gold, the joy, the JoyVenture in it for yourself. After all, you are 100% Response Able for how you Choose to respond to anything. It’s the beauty of it all, YOU are in charge, YOU get to choose OR not….the bad news YOU are responsible for all of it too. So take a moment and choose: Conscious or Unconscious…you reap the rewards AND you are on the hook...